Self-care for Sensitive Souls
Reconnect with your inner resources
You won’t be surprised to learn that at New Year, there’s a spike in sales of self-help books.
But why is it we so rarely actually finish one?
We love self-help books. They guarantee a solution to our woes for £9.99. What’s not to like?
But often we’re disappointed. The book doesn’t live up to the proud promise on the front cover and we’re left feeling vaguely cheated, and inadequate because we haven’t transformed. Again.
Well, the reason is simple. We expect too much from self-help books.
They can’t deliver on the promise because they’re not doing the work for us. We’ve got to do it. Ah.
There’s a wealth of information and insight to be had from self-help books. Is that useful? Yes. Life-changing? Not so much.
So if the content is useful, why don’t self-help books change your life?
The biggest limitation of self-help books is that the writer can’t engage in relationship with you.
She can’t monitor how you’re getting on, spot what you actually need and provide it, or encourage you when you’re flagging.
You’re buying a blueprint. It’s not specific to you (obviously, it can’t be).
You have inner ‘stuff’ that trips you up as you do your work on yourself.
You need support to actually follow through all those steps and worksheets, because change (aka self-help) is hard.
Alright then, now what?
Well, if you’re an inveterate self-help consumer, by all means add yet another tome to that teetering pile on the bedside table.
But when you get to the point where you stop buying them (because you despair / you’ve got cynical / there’s now a whole Amazon warehouse with your name on it) …
… don’t give up on what you’re looking for.
Here’s what to do:
1. Get clear on how things are for you now, and how you want them to be
2. Gather information (from friends, your books, the internet) on what might work for you
3. Find the people who can help you make it happen
Each of those simple steps is powerful in itself. Taken together, they pack more life-changing dynamite than that warehouse full of self-help books.
Here’s to you.